The Chinese Online Writing Lab

In terms of general writing style, use the proper copyediting marks to correct the following sentences. Refer to the preferred answer (denoted as "Try") when making corrections:

2. Simplify your meaning
(a). Instead of
The proposed method results in performance improvement.
Try
The proposed method improves (enhances, upgrades, elevates) performance.
(b). Instead of
In order to obtain a better understanding.
Try
To more thoroughly understand.
(c). Instead of
There are five schemes we shall discuss in the paper which are applied to the architecture shown in Fig. 1.
Try
Five schemes discussed herein are applied to the architecture in Fig. 1.
(d). Instead of
Currently, there are more than fifty varieties of bulk pharmaceuticals produced in Taiwan.
Try
More than fifty varieties of bulk pharmaceuticals are produced in Taiwan.

3. Avoid unclear pronoun or demonstrative references.
NOTE: Avoid using too many pronoun references (It is...., They are .... which is....) or demonstratives (This is.... That is ....)
(a). Instead of
The proposed scheme decreases the total carried traffic by keeping the requests in a queue, which means that the conventional scheme makes a poor channel utilization again.
Try
The fact that the proposed scheme decreases the total carried traffic by maintaining the requests in a queue implies (suggests) that the conventional scheme again poorly utilizes the channel.
or Try
The proposed scheme's decrease in the total carried traffic by maintaining the requests in a queue implies (suggests) that the conventional scheme again poorly utilizes the channel.
or even try
The proposed scheme decreases the total carried traffic by maintaining the requests in a queue; such a decrease (this occurrence) indicates that the conventional scheme again poorly utilizes the channel.
(b). Instead of
They are not performing as well as the solvent-based counterparts although they are very environmental friendly by reducing the VOC drastically.
Try
Although having significantly reduced VOCs, their performance is not as high as the solvent-based counterparts.
(c). Instead of
The key in the developing of the foreign market is how to succeed through high quality. This is because foreign countries have an extremely high standard on quality of the products. It is especially Europe, Japan and the United States.
Try
Developing a product for the foreign market involves(entails) understanding how to compete with an extremely high standard of product quality, particularly in Europe, Japan and the United States.

4. Create strong verbs
(a). Instead of
is greater than
Try
exceeds
(b). Instead of
The procedure is to turn on the machine.
Try
The procedure involves(entails) turning on the machine.
(c). Instead of
A is like B.
Try
A resembles B.

5. Avoid needless redundancy and repetitiveness.
(a). Instead of
The printing industry provides people with all kinds of printed materials: from daily newspapers to fashion magazines. These magazines add color to our everyday lives though the organic solvents used contain high content of volatile organic compounds which accounts for smog and other environmental problems. It is also
hazardous to the print shop workers. Some of the imported waterborne printing inks may solve theseproblems. However, the price is three to ten times higher than the conventional solvent-based print inks.
Try
The organic solvents used extensively in the printing industry contain many volatile organic compounds which arre potentially hazardous to humans and the surrounding environment. Some imported waterborne printing inks, although capable of solving related problems, cost three to ten times higher than the conventional solvent-based ones.
(b). Instead of
Since the climate on Orchid Island is relatively hot and humid compared to Taiwan, the research team from the Research Institute decided to return them to their native habitat on Orchid Island to allow the butterflies to be successfully born.
Try
The fact that Orchid Island's climate is generally hotter and more humid than the rest of Taiwan led to the research team's decision to return the than the rest of Taiwan led to the research team's decision to return the butterflies to their native habitat, thereby ensuring their successful birth.